May 1st, 2009

Soi Fong

Weekends, Courswork, Lixi, Jelly Babies, Brothers, Changes's so nice to be at the end of the week, and to have a three-day weekend ahead of you!

-enjoys the feeling of amazingness-

I can stay in bed on Sunday and Monday. And it feels very odd to say Monday and sleeping in in the same sentence. Mondays are usually more like this, "SHIFT ARSE! IT'S TWENTY TO EIGHT! WE'RE LATE! Argh, shit ain't done my homework...shit.... RUN FOR THE CAR!" 

Mondays aren't good news in my book.....

Anyway, back on topic, what was I going to say?.....


I have some updates on the coursework front! 

Food is done. Kaput. Gone. I got my scores back on that today, and I managed 51...of 105. And then of course, we have the grade for that, which toted up to a BIG FAT D. And a very near miss, that was too, because I scored 51.

The pass mark to make it into the D grade was....50.

TWO marks.

TWO itty bitty little marks were all that stood in the way between me and a big fat UGLY E. And what's worse, those two little marks could just as easily go away if my coursework is sent away to be moderated externally. Ah, shit I hope it's not. Cause that...that would be bad. Very very very very bad. I mean, a score card like this?

English A
Maths B
Food Tech D
Geography A

Looks out of place does that D, but not horrendous.

English A
Maths B
Food Tech E
Geography A

That? Looks horrible. Like someone's puked everywhere horrible.

Eww....I can't bare to look at it a moment longer.

Moving on.

Geography coursework is done and she's doing something with it. If ya asked me, I couldn't tell ya what, but she's said it's okay and that I had a B. Fingers crossed, anyway, all that's left to conquer in this subject is the EXAM.

Eek, scary thought there, run away.

Prep for Working Life is handed in, (WTF? Such a shit subject) and sent away today - the glories of printer issues.

Business Studies - needs more work but I have a handle on that, so we're cool there. And I've the Higgy a copy so if my computer DOES eat it, I have a back-up plan. Unless she looses it in which case - Shit.


Okay, she won't loose it (or I'll be having WORDS) and I'll work hard on it this weekend! There we are, nice and positive~

Aye, it's going to be a toughie, ain't Lixi? Like you keep telling me.

Oh, BTW guys, if I suddenly start refering to myself in the second person, that's LIXI taking over. She's the organised half of me - if I had a twin, she'd be it - my opposite in every way. Seriously, she takes over and sends me emails, giving me to do lists, and orders and making me work. It's like having a sectretary, only she can view my thoughts, doesn't bring me coffee and gives me Brain Hurts when I fail at something. Oh, and I never remember half the things she does, and yet she uses MY memory banks.

Freaky and also - random thought....

Mental note, I need a new coffee cup - my old one is kinda old now....

Back on track, yeah, I'm not being funny. It's honestly not me, it's her. She's really really bossy and dominant and it's kinda scary having her inside my head when she's like Stalin crossed with Hitler's determination and battle plans for me to have a organised life. Trust me, she's SCARY. I'll find you a picture of her someday.

Yeah, so what it's weird to have people inside your head?

And anyway, she's been organising today - so I'm going to be godawfully busy these next few days. Be prepared for me to come and go like the wind, or like a really slow car. Either or, these days.

She produced something else for me that I'll put on another post,  but not here - slows it down too much to C/P it.

Ah shit....Tried to send an email with some music attachments things for Jasia, and I had nine of them. Apparently, that exceeded the global limits, so I had to pack it up and send it in batches of three. Turns out that even THREE is too much for the global limit, so I've had to shrink to ONE.

It'll take me all night, at this rate. D:

I'll do it anyway, because the Love of Mae's Music must go on - so few people listen to her, but her music is just as good as, if not better, than some of the stupid main stream bands and artists.

-eats Jellybaby-

Mmmm...I love mah JELLY BABIES. Ooh, it's a BUMPER - means it's orange flavoured....If I don't eating these, I'll end up paring them or something. Hmm...Boofuls/Brilliant or Bubbles/Big Heart sounds...oh Lord, I'm shipping.


Anyway, aside from my appalling eating habits, what other news do I have for you?

I need to find my birth certificate, and my National Insurance details. Because I'll need them come August.

Umm...Oh yeah, I'm moving rooms during the holidays! I'm moving into my brother's room in the last week of August. And he's pissed off about it, because in his words, "I'm an ADULT! I SHOULD HAVE THE BIG ROOM!"

No, Matthew, no. You're an adult so you should have a job, work hard at school and go to uni or out into the world of work with your OWN place. You shouldn't slack off during school, don't bother doing any school, and then end up with the wrong course that means you have to do an extra year at college. Oh and while you're at it, you should have worked harder with your Maths coursework and not got an F, and then you could have been at work more. You shouldn't spend hours mucking around in your room, playing on the X-box and watching porn - you should be out looking for a job and earning some REAL money, instead of scrounging off of me and mum. You should also stop blaming us for every little thing that you do wrong like when you got a note from your tutor that said you're failing your IT course. You should stop kidding yourself that you're the next Bill Gates or amazing gamer because you aren't. You're average at IT with a little more knowledge than the average layman because you did an IT course. Your gaming skills are worth diddly squit because you don't have the behind knowledge to tide you over. You don't have enough points for Uni, you haven't got a passport, a job or any intention to shift arse on anything, and you have the moral compass of a magnetised pigeon.



Jeezus Christ, I don't love him right now.

I want to change the room around, kick it about a bit to see what happens. I'll talk more about that in another post, though, otherwise I'll get sidetracked.

Matthew, you need drive. And determination. And sticking power.

You change your mind about things more often than the weather changes; you have no staying power.

You say, "I want to buy object X that costs £100."

And then you said, "I'm going to save like mad, because it'll be AWESOME!"

And then you turn around as soon as the first tenner crosses your palm, and you spend it on something else.


I'm such a freaking saver. I hardly ever change my mind about important things - and even then, only after long consideration. And if I say I want that object X, I'll ignore it, and put away my money until two months later, I have the cash and it's like WOW - I HAVE ENOUGH TO BUY IT NOW!

He's so happy with the NOW.

I'm with the FUTURE and learning from the past.

But he's also never going to get anyway, unless his attitude gets a make-over. And soon. And he'd never do it on his own - he needs a sharp shock, like having to pay rent and board, and having to fund EVERYTHING himself.

He's going to fail, I keep thinking, and every day he's just a little bit more on that boat. He never changes.

I, on the other hand, have made a decision. This next year? 

I want to be different. I don't want to be fat, and unhealthy, and late for everything, and missing deadlines left right and centre.

I hate that - I always feel ugly and horrible and like an overgrown slug and how people must be laughing at me behind my back. I feel like I'm always two steps behind everyone else, because I'm always late, and that I'll NEVER catch up. And missing deadlines? Bad feelings and bad grades abound.

I want to improve in every way.


So, like Arylett did, I'm setting myself goals, and I will try my very hardest to stick to them. I'll post them later because I'll need to figure how to do the wording of them, but essentially, they cover all those areas that I want to target.

I'm so sick and tired of living the way I do - disorganised, and forgetful.

I'm gonna change.

I have to change.

I WILL change.


Room (Unfinished) & Book Reccies List

So, in the last entry I mention changing rooms, right?

Well, here's what I plan to do.

I plan to make it a monochromatic bedroom, black and white bedding, and pale furniture.

Lots of pictures in clip frames and a white board on the wall.

I'll have a double bed! Woo~

Also, links for the next post -